Ugh KILL ME

Well I've done it again, left it all down to the wire. I knew I would but I was kind of hoping that maybe, just maybe, JUST ONCE I would be able to do things like a regular person.

But no. I have 5 pages of a 30 page paper done, a paper that is due on tuesday. So effectively, tomorrow. And it MUST be done on tuesday.

I can do it. It is possible. But I will have to push myself really very hard and I am so not good at that. I mean obviously. Or this wouldn't be a problem.

This is all compounded by the fact that it is officially the most uninteresting boring project ever to be assigned. Seriously. Even the men who spend their lives (oh and they are ALL men of course) writing about this stuff know that its the dreariest topic on the face of the earth. Example: I found the following sentence in the preface to 'The Elizabethan Conquest of Ireland: A Pattern Established 1565-1576' by Nicholas Canny:
"In the short term I will be more than satisfied if my critics judge me to have answered Professor Sir John Neale who once challenged me 'to make sixteenth century Ireland interesting.'"

If fucking Nicholas sodded Canny is saying that, he who wrote what must be thousands of pages on that very topic, than I know that I am not just an ignorant american. This shit is INTERMINABLE. They should read it to rapists in prison until they go insane.

Oh my god. It is awful. I wish I was dead.

I have my first professional meeting tomorrow as an actor and I wish I was dead. Perfect. My career is getting off to a fabulous start.

Ok, enough stalling.